Ninja

On to happier notes. My baby is a ninja. No, not the baby that just turned 2, but the one housed in my uterus. I'm convinced he is a ninja, because these kicks are crazy! I'm almost half convinced that he may be the spawn of Chuck Norris (Chuck Norris doesn't need to have sex to get a girl pregnant, he just looks at a girl and says "Now" and she's knocked up), because I'm pretty sure he's roundhouse kicked me several times already, though I haven't told Jon this yet. ;) See with Sophia, she wasn't a kicker. She was a nudger, pusher, and a roller. Jon didn't feel her at all until I was 24 weeks, and even then he had to ask me if that was the baby or my pulse. Even when she was bigger she didn't kick a lot. But this little guy is tough! Jon felt him kick when he was only 17 and a half weeks!!! And I thought I felt him at 14 weeks, but my adjusted due date shows that I was only 13 weeks when I first felt him! It's just crazy how different he is from Sophia already, though it does leave a bit of dreaded terror to think what kind of firecracker I'm going to birth...Oh well, still so much to look forward to in June!!! :)

Biopsy - A Four Letter Word?

The thing that's on my mind these days (okay, so really there are lots, but right this second this is one) is skin biopsies. After I had Sophie I had a mole removed that was ugly, and it came back that it had some atypical cells in it. The doctors also call them "pre-cancer cells", but since that sounds a lot scarier than it is, I will stick with the actual name. Anyway, so about 7 weeks after having Sophie I had to go in to the dermatologist and have every mole on my body looked at with a little device (which that soon after birth let's just say that my body was still a disaster and laying there naked on the exam table while the dermatologist and her nurses looked me over was no fun!) that resulted in me getting a 3-inch football shaped chunk of skin cut out where the first mole had come from, along with another mole that was much smaller, but they had to go pretty deep to get out all of the atypical cells they found in that one. Neither of these were of any concern to me when I saw them, but apparently could have turned into something much worse. So on top of recovering from childbirth, now I had stitches to recover from as well. Good times. I was told to go back every year to have the same exam done, but last year our insurance was, well, not so helpful, so it didn't get done.

Fast forward to this year. I went last week to get checked and hoped against hope that they would look me over, say "everything looks great, just keep an eye of things" and let me go. No such luck. They found 3 spots that looked suspicious. So along with being massively uncomfortable seeing a new doctor (male this time too, ugh) and standing there in my paper gown while he and his two nurses looked me over, I then had to sit there even longer while I had three moles removed and now get to do the fun part of caring for these spots so they don't scar terribly while waiting for the biopsy results to tell me if there were 1) any atypical cells present and 2) if they got them all out the first time or if I'll have to go in for more. It sucks. Not going to lie. Of course I much rather have moles removed and chunks of skin cut out now than to get skin cancer and have to deal with that, but the whole experience to me is annoying, humiliating, painful, stressful, and just all around not a good time. I would much rather be worrying about getting a job right now than whether or not I'm going to have to get chopped up and studied some more. But no. Genetics and constant sunburns as a kid have taken that privilege away. I wasn't even a big tanner - I went to the tanning bed a few times, but not often. There was one summer where I tanned constantly, and that's when I lived in Bear Lake. Still dumb, but you see these girls who go tanning every week or more, and I can't help but wonder if they will have to deal with the same stuff I am. Hopefully no, because it sucks. But I'll never know. Anyway, I'm just venting right now, but hopefully through my vent everyone can remember to put on some sunscreen and get checked on for signs of anything that could lead to skin cancer or even just atypical cells so you don't have to go through what I am or worse. And please cross your fingers for me that my biopsies come back okay! :-\

It's a......

BOY!!!!! Or, as Jon likes to call it, a little baby tripod! ;) He is definitely one proud daddy, that's for sure! We had our anatomy ultrasound today and wouldn't ya know it, we're having a baby boy in June! Oh my goodness I am so stinking excited!!! I mean, if it had been a girl that would have been awesome too - but I really wanted a boy this time so I'm pretty dang happy! He was so cute to - when the nurse first started the ultrasound I think that he was asleep and he was facing my back, so she starts looking at his spine and suddenly he twitches a little and looks over his shoulder like "What the heck is going on???" He looked like he tried to go back to sleep but, of course, that darn wand was pushing up on him so he finally started squirming around for us. He even kicked the wand one time. :) He was crossing his little feet, which was adorable but wouldn't come out good in the picture, and he had his hands tucked up under his chin for the most part. Oh I just love him already! And Sophie (other than being super cranky because we subbed at a daycare this morning which she did not think was fun after the first hour or so) seems to be happy to have a cute little "Bo baby" or a little "brooder". :)

Anyway, here are the pictures we got (that are interesting anyway):

Here he is in all his glory! There were no doubts about it! :)

His cute little profile. <3

Another profile - you can see part of his little hand there by his face.

Ha ha, Sophie had a scary/creepy picture that looked like a skull and crossbones, so I had to put this one up of his face looking a little alien-ish. :)

And a closer one of his sweet little face. :)

I am getting so very very excited for June to get here! (Or if I'm lucky like I was with Sophie, possibly May!) I wasn't quite as far along as they originally thought (blah) so I'm 18 weeks and 6 days now, but either way, as long as he's here before we go to Utah for rotations I'm happy! :) Anyway, just wanted to share with my blogging-world friends and let you all know about our adorable little boy! :)

"Where Do You Want To Be In 10 Years..."

Did anyone ever have to do one of these in high school? Where you have to say where you want your life to be in 5 years, and then in 10 years? Well I did. I remember I did one when I was 16. I don't remember if it was in school or in Young Women's, but I do remember thinking, "How the heck should I know?" and thinking that life was good enough right then that I'm sure I would be fine with whatever was happening in 10 years. Of course I wrote down some things, just general ones that I put on there just to fulfill the assignment (I'm not THAT much of a planner I guess!) but the ones that I do remember is saying that I wanted to be married by this point and wanted to have children (or be close to having children).

Well, it's been 10 years. Wow. 10 years ago I was 16, and I knew everything and ruled the world. I got asked out by my first boyfriend the day I turned 16, had my first kiss, got my drivers license, was loving being in Colorguard and in Band, got my first job at the movie theater (woot), had my first break-up later that year, went to my first school dances, my best friends were Katie and Sharece, and while I knew that the future was ever looming ahead of me, I truly lived in the moment. So I guess the question is: Where am I now?

Now, I am 26. I still know everything, and I still rule the world. Okay, so I knew that I didn't know everything when I was 16, and I know even more so that I don't know everything now, but I'm okay with that. :) In the past 10 years I graduated from high school, had my heart broken a couple of times, met the love of my life, got married, bought a house (the house is now rubble to make room for a road), traveled a little (mostly for work, but hey! Travel is travel!), had my beautiful daughter that I love more than anything, made some amazing friends and met some amazing people, kept in touch with old friends, grew closer to my family than ever before, moved to Arizona, bought our second home, met more amazing people, have another baby on the way, and am back applying to work in a movie theater (okay, it's the play center so I'd be watching kids instead of making popcorn at least!). Oh, and I've gained a few pounds and stretchmarks along the way. :-\

I think I've learned in the past 10 years, more than anything else, to trust in God and to know that every new change is a new adventure. I've learned that even if you think you know the plan, you don't always, and that's okay. If life turned out the way I had planned it when I was in high school.........oh dear I don't even want to think about it! I guess I'm just happy to know that my Heavenly Father has helped guide me to where I am today, and I'm so thankful every day that I had the courage to listen to Him and to ask for his guidance during those times when I didn't know which way was up. Because of this, I have become the person I am today, and I am truly happy with this.

So now what? What can I expect in the next 10 years? Well, I'll have to work on that list for a bit, because I'm still not sure. I know that we'll work on getting Jon through school and into his career, I may go to school for something (I really need to, but I still don't know what!), I'll finish having kids and enjoy watching them grow, hopefully we'll move back to Utah, oh, and of course I'll become a world famous supermodel. Or something like that... Who knows! All I know is that I will pray and trust in the Lord and in my family and that regardless of what happens in between now and then, we'll still be together and happy. :)

Surprise Surprise!

Well, as most of you may have seen on Facebook (because Facebook is the window into everyone's lives) Jon and I are expecting our second baby in June!!! Oh goodness, this has been such a roller coaster from the beginning. No, more like The Rocket - everything was fine and dandy until suddenly and unexpectedly life decided to blast off. See, Jon and I had discussed possible timeline's for our next little bundle - and the conclusion was that we wouldn't even try for at least a year. This was in October, shortly after Jon's cousin moved into our spare room. Prior to this we though of next November, and I panicked a little at the thought of having another baby "that soon". Ha ha, little did I know! Two whole days after deciding to wait at least a year, I took a test - not expecting much, but only slightly worried - and life went from predictable and stable to numb. Yep, I was numb. For hours. I had just dropped Jon off at school and Sophie went down for an early nap, so I was alone in my room staring at a test thinking "Huh." So I tried to go through the motions of daily tasks, even tried to go to a Halloween party with some of the other Midwestern Wives (they have a sort of club) but wasn't feeling it and left early. After I picked Jon up from school, I decided that regardless of my lack of any type of emotion other than raw shock and slight fear, I would be damned if I didn't tell Jon in a clever way.

At first I planned on getting a card or something, but they didn't have any that said "Congratulations Daddy!" or anything like that, so I walked around looking for a "Big Sister" shirt for Sophie or something along those lines and came up with...nothing. After about an hour I decided to settle on simple. I bought a baby bottle, filled it with mini Gummy Bears, and bought some Sugar Babies and left it at that. I went home and Sophie was down for another nap (rare, for her age, but she hadn't slept much the night before) so I found Jon alone in our room studying. And that's about the time that the fear emotion decided to go crazy. Because of this, I couldn't talk, so I tried to lightly toss the baby bottle on the bed and managed to throw it pretty hard. Jon picked it up and said "Oh Gummy Bears! Thanks!"

.....Yeah he didn't get it. On to Phase II of the plan. I threw the Sugar Babies at him. To this he looked a little confused (it's not a candy we ever buy) but said, "Oh, I haven't had these in a while. Thanks."

.....Still didn't get it. Okay, Phase III. It was an impromptu phase, but I pulled out the test showing the little blue plus sign and threw that at him.

This time, he got it.

He smiled and said "Really?" and that was the moment that all my numbness went away and a river of emotions came out. I told him how worried I was about adding more stress to his schooling, how unprepared I felt, and the biggest one - how the due date was right when he was supposed to start his rotations that he requested to do in Utah. I don't have insurance in Utah, you see, so I was sure that I would be left alone here in Arizona to have the baby by myself while Jon was on rotations in another state. That's when he informed me that for 2/3 of the summer quarter they are on rotations, but for the other 1/3 they have vacation, and for medical reasons he could request the first part off! So I cried a lot more because of pure relief at this, and he continued to tell me how excited he was. Honestly, his response was the best thing ever! It was still hard to get used to the idea of TWO kids, but at least I knew that it wasn't unwelcomed. :)

So yes, that is the story. It was a stressful first few weeks while I wrestled with my fears, but after hearing the heartbeat I started to get excited. :)

We also decided to keep it a secret from our families until Christmas. Since we live in another state, it was pretty easy! I did break down and tell my mom when I had a bad day, but other than that it was a complete surprise. I was also lucky in that by the time we were in Utah to tell everyone and to celebrate Christmas, my morning sickness was gone and I had a pretty good baby bump to show off. (Yes, my uterus likes to pop out at a ridiculously early timeframe...) Shoot, at 11 weeks I had this to show!

Yeah, I was really glad we were in Arizona because otherwise I'm not sure how I would have kept it a secret at all. (Sorry the picture is super fuzzy)

Anyway, so when it came time to go to Utah for Christmas, we figured out quickly that I was either going to have to wear a huge hoodie the whole time until the big unveiling, or just tell people early. Well lucky us, we had a ton of family over the next morning so I was able to announce it to my Mother-in-law and 3 of my sisters-in-law! Their husbands found out that night when we all when to dinner that night, so the only ones who didn't know at this point were Jon's other brother and wife who couldn't make it and his aunt and uncle and cousins who we would see on Christmas Eve. Oh, and my family of course. :)

This was how we announced. Cheesy, but (mostly) affective. :)

When Jon's brother saw me with my bow on Christmas Eve he thought I was just "packaging" myself for Jon. I had to explain that we had already done that and this was the result. (Hee hee hee)

We went up to Cache Valley after than and announced to my family - who was just as thrilled! It was so fun to be able to finally tell everyone! Truthfully it kind of made the whole first part of the pregnancy go by faster, in my opinion, when I couldn't complain about it every second of the day! Also, it's a huge relief letting people in my ward and neighborhood know that I'm not just getting a grotesque pot belly, but there's a reason for it. :)

And then of course there's the picture that I announced on Facebook with. See, I didn't have my camera cable, and I didn't want to put the bow on again, so this is what you got. :) Side note - this was the day before we left for home and I got really sick that day and couldn't eat anything but soup. Makes for good pictures, but sure wasn't fun! :-\

Sophie seems to be taking it well. Okay well really, I don't think she has any idea. I try to tell her, and she'll point and my belly and say "Baby" and I think "Yes! She understands!" until she turns around and points at Daddy's belly and her belly and says the same thing. (Sigh) Soon, I hope. The fun part lately has been asking her if she wants a girl baby or a boy baby, or asking if she wants a brother or sister. She switches back and forth, but lately she's been sticking with boy. :)

Anyway, this has been my pregnancy thus far. Filled with sickness, worry, happiness, and joy. We find out what we're having on the 18th, and I can't wait! Truth be told - I want a boy, but will be very happy to have another girl too. :) So, to send us off, here's a randomly cute picture of Sophie wearing her new scarf that Aunt Amber made for her. :) Enjoy!

(P.S. If anyone knows of any names that have some sort of meaning along the lines of "Surprise", "Meant to Be", etc, let me know! I haven't found any for either a boy or a girl! Not that we will necessarily use them, but it's fun to know!)